Sunday, July 8, 2012

Eva: A Real Mom of Incredible Faith

One thing I have enjoyed about spotlighting these different Moms is the variety involved. Last week, I featured my friend Sandi who is now a Grandma- I think it so great for us young(er) Mom’s to appreciate perspectives from before us. Today, Mrs. Eva is gracing us with wisdom. This woman is AMAZING!
I met Mrs. Eva while her son, Greg, was attending TBI. Greg was a graduate of the Bible school and followed by coming on staff with BMI. The circumstances I met her through, were not the best but have enabled me to learn so much from this incredible woman of faith. While working at the camp, Greg was struck by lightening. While he was rehabilitating, Mrs. Eva flew to Texas from New York to be with him. I admired that she was not his Mom, but his advocate in every way. You would walk in to see Greg, and all you saw and heard was scripture and faith. I am sure Eva had difficult moments, but she never once allowed them to rule or dominate her, Greg or the circumstance.
Doctors said many times many things that Greg would NEVER do, but Greg has proven him wrong in every circumstance. Mrs. Eva stood beside him never allowing The Word that was put in him to die- and I believe that is the main reason he has broken the odds.
Every time Mrs. Eva would come to the camp to visit, she taught me something within our conversation whether short or long. Every time I log onto Facebook, there is an encouraging word on Mrs. Eva’s status- never fails. I hope you take something away from this great Woman of Faith today:

I was born Eva Marie Robinson and I ALWAYS thought that name meant PRINCESS. I was one of 6 kids by two parents who were both very strongly opinionated. They both had hard lives as kids thus; we were raised with modified imperfect parenting. Of course, as children, were NEVER going to raise our own kids "that way."
As a young girl, I always wanted to be married and have children. I NEVER saw my life without that. I did work outside my home as an adult, never aspiring to climb the corporate ladder. 
I wanted to have a family and my family has always been more important to me
I knew of God, but was not saved until I was pregnant with my 4th child. As I grew in my relationship with Jesus, I knew I wanted my children to have this Jesus and committed them to Him through dedications at church.
Being a mom. Oh I so did not know what that meant. Unrealistic dreams and ideas of perfect children created problems (for me) but I want people to know that the grace of God is amazing. It was only by His grace that I did not hurt my kids or go crazy (literally). And because He is good, things did turn out well. My only advice to new couples and new to be parents would be to love God more than you love each other- because if you love God, you will know how to love each other. It really is a process and step-by-step we move forward. I still love being a mommy, but now I am a mommy to men-children who have lives of their own- it’s a new adventure. I'm ready and so are they.
Jeremy & Rachel's Engagement
The best piece of advice I can offer: Don't do anything you don't want your kids to do, because they will do what you do.
Parenting journey and patience: I had four children. They each had a mind of their own. You cannot parent each child alike because they are different. And because their daddy worked very long hours, I did a lot of the parenting on my own. Let's just say, this required patience but I didn't practice it so well. Thank God for grace.
Each of my children described in one word would be: Markie--Miraculous, Jeremy--gift, Greg--truth, Micah—peace.
The scheduled or unscheduled Mom: I so wanted to be the scheduled mom but failed miserably. Because we had special needs children in our home, it was best to be extremely flexible.
My Mommy pet peeve, there was too many. I had extremely unreasonable expectations for "family". I watched the Walton’s growing up and well, let's just say, we weren't the Walton’s.

I carry the most guilt for not enjoying my children more.
Embarrassing moment: The kids were older, young teens. I was getting ready for church. They asked what they could do to help (per dad's instructions- good Daddy). I asked one to make sure their brothers stayed dressed and no messes while I grabbed a quick shower, and the other I asked if they would set my "thongs" by the door so I could just throw them on and get everyone to church. Well, you can imagine…
If I could change something, I really did want to enjoy my family so much more. I had a lot of baggage when I got married and that spilled into my parenting skills. When I finally learned to laugh, it was so much fun.
My first thoughts after my children were born:

Markie-fear and I was very protective because the doctors told us he would die and not to get attached to him.
Jeremy-I had instant gratification because he was just perfect.
Greg- So happy he was healthy and perfect.
Micah-fear and sadness because he had problems the doctors could not diagnose in the beginning. I got to hold him 2 seconds after birth but he was blue.
What would I do differently? Hug more, kiss more, talk differently, and laugh a lot.
I said I would NEVER talk like my mom and point my finger with my hand on my hip. Ha-Ha!
Fear: I was not afraid when I first found I was pregnant. From the time I was a teen, all I ever wanted was to be married and raise a family.
There were things I was very aware of because of the way I was parented. I was raised under criticism, control, and manipulation. I didn't know how to laugh. God taught me how. I learned that the power of your words is extremely important when raising children. For example when Greg would lie to us, daddy and I would say, "Greg, your name means truth seeker. Therefore you are not allowed to lie." He did take that to heart and we heard him defending his name later in life.
My boys were so very sweet and sweet natured. I loved them as children and even now that they are adults. God and Dr. Dobson were my counselors and even then I didn't do everything right. But God . . . We must rely on Him so very much. I envied moms that looked like they had it all together only to find out, they had their own struggles. I'm just so grateful my children love me in spite of my parenting or non-parenting skills. Pray, pray, pray and be willing to change. I had to be willing to say I'm sorry to my kids when I was wrong. I had to humble myself much because growing up I didn't receive this type of parenting. It was a learning and growing process and just when I think I've got it down right, we enter another phase in life.

1 comment:

  1. Eva...incredible example of a Godly woman...I wanna be like her when (if I ever) grow up.