Timing and Trust

Been awhile! To be honest, as much as I've been itching to blog, I have also intentionally avoided it. I typically write pretty candidly on what's going on in my life and what I'm learning from the processes. Well, I am once again going through a challenging issue with my health and am extremely angry and frustrated by it. Although, I probably will write about it eventually- I am choosing to write about some other things that my family has faced and how God brought us through the other sidein His timing!

First, let me tell how Lupe and I received an envelope with $1000 cash inside!

 After getting settled in our new apartment at the beginning of February, we were very relieved and also a bit stressed. God had provided the money we needed to get us in our new place, but we were then faced with very limited funds throughout the month of February. We just began to pray and believe God to provide what we needed for every day. As I began to make preparations to celebrate Gia's Birthday on the first, I was feeling a bit guilty for spending the little money I did (I already had the decorations, but a present and cake..). On Gianna's Birthday, a very close friend of ours text Lupe to wish Gia a Happy Birthday, he also asked how we were doing. Lupe text that everything was well, just having some financial challenges. K.L. (I will just call him "K.L" to protect his privacy) joked that he needed to send Lupe an envelope of cash "..like Donny Brasco.." (Lupe and K.L. always joke around as if they are mobsters ). I laughed, didn't put any weight into the comment.
A few days later, I was on the phone with my friend Joanne. We began talking about some of the financial challenges we were having, as we spoke I began to cry. I guess I was beginning to feel a bit overwhelmed. Joanne quickly began to encourage me and remind me of God's faithfulness. When I hung up the phone, I felt better, but told God "Alright God, I trust you for what I need for today and will leave the tomorrows until tomorrow..".

The mailman knocked on the door as I was about to get in the shower. To be honest, the first thing that went through my mind was "GREAT! Now they're sending us certified letters to pay our bills!!", but as I shut the door I noticed the return address on the package was from K.L. Then I remembered he had mentioned that he was sending Gia a birthday gift. There was a card and some money for each of the girls and Lupe, as I opened the card for Lupe (yes, I opened my husbands mail) I see a $100 bill- as I picked it up it was more than one bill. My mouth hit the floor and I began to sob as I counted 10 $100 bills in that card. My heart began to flip flop all over the place!! I immediately called Lupe, and as my ever so calm unshakable husband always is, his response was "...well, he was pulling a Donny Brasco..." (as I'm sobbing on the other end). I then called Joanne back and told her what happened, her response was what I was expecting (unlike my smooth husband), a squeal and excitement.
WHY did God choose to do it the way He did? I don't know, but I know it was in His timing (which is perfect) and we never went without. I am thankful for faithful friends who stood and encouraged and were obedient.

Another challenge that we have been facing for a few years is our car!! About 2 1/2 years ago, we were driving a Toyota Camry which was just getting to cramped with our toddler and a baby and all their stuff. We needed/wanted a small SUV- and the one we (mainly I) wanted was a Saturn Outlook. Well, we found one and were given a pretty good deal on it- only problem was it was an extremely high interest rate. When Lupe inquired to a very close friend and mentor (who was very knowledgeable about buying vehicles) on what options he may have and how to negotiate- the friend offered to put up the collateral for the loan to keep our interest rate down. We accepted, which in retrospect was a mistake. We loved that Outlook, but we HAD to love it- we were way upside down and our payments were way to much!

After we moved to Florida from Texas, our friend who had put up the collateral, asked us to get new financing for the vehicle- considering we were upside down on it, we could not get new financing. Since we left Texas, the relationship with our friend has become a bit strained and uncomfortable, which makes the whole car situation just feel even worse. We began to have that feeling of a car owning us instead of us owning a car. Lupe never gave up on looking for another car or financing, he would try and get turned down and have an offer that just would not work.

Last week, Lupe had just walked away from another offer that just wouldn't work when he received a letter in the mail from another dealership in the area saying they thought they could help. Lupe called them and explained where we were at and what we needed. We wanted to go back to a car now that the girls were older and a smaller vehicle would work, not to mention the gas mileage on a car would be much better!

Long story short, Lupe spoke to the dealership on Thursday night, they called him to come over on Friday night saying they could make it work, and Friday night he drove home in our brand NEW Mitsubishi Gallant!! We now have a lower payment, lower interest, and are getting 40mi/gal instead of 18mi/gal (THAT'S a big deal!), and this will hopefully remove some of the strain with our friend and start a healing process of our relationship.
We are getting used to "riding on the ground" again and are loving the gas mileage! I will admit, I miss the roominess of our Outlook, the adjustable steering wheel and satellite radio, and with summer approaching we will definitely miss our automatic start button! But, it's so worth it  for all the reasons I mentioned above.
We have been dealing with this situation for about 1 1/2 years....why didn't God work it out in the beginning? I don't know, but I am thankful that he sustained us until now with that crazy high payment and has now provided us with exactly what we need. Yet again, we never did without.
I don't understand God's timing, but I don't guess I have to. I just have to trust that His timing IS perfect.
Please continue to pray with me regarding some of this health stuff, I am trying to have faith and trust- but I will admit it's a struggle.

Valentines Memories Past

Valentines Day! What a great day to show love! Not that we shouldn't show it every day, but it's a day we set aside to focus on the love we have for others and celebrate the love others have for us.

This morning, I was awakened by my girls excitement and the smell of my favorite omelet and croissants baking. Lupe woke up, even earlier than normal, and had spoiled all of his girls with sweet little somethings as well as a big yummy breakfast. What I love, is that he did it all because he wanted to and not out of obligation. While eating that incredible breakfast, I began to remember Valentines of the past- there is one that stands out back to when Lupe and I were engaged.

I began to plan early on. I called one of Lupe's staff in the kitchen and recruited him as my accomplice. I bought/made probably 30+ cards and wrote something different in each one, and some of them I put candy or a little something with. I shoved them all into an envelope and sent them off to Jeremy (my accomplice). I kind of new Lupe's routine and such throughout the day, so each card I sent to Jeremy had a location sticky noted to it. Lupe's drawers, closet, mirror, sink, the toilet, in the shower, on his pillow, the thermostat, refrigerator, cabinets, T.V., remote, pantry, in the coffee pot, microwave, back door, car steering wheel, car glove box, and the list goes on..! What I loved, is that he continued to find those cards for weeks!

Now, here is the funny part. Lupe had been making plans of his own....needless to say...he did not receive his Valentines until the day after Valentines Day! That's right! He had his own accomplices...my mom and dad!

Lupe had been planning to fly to Florida (he was in Texas- long distance dating) for Valentines Day to surprise me for quite some time! He was flying into Tampa that morning and my parents were picking him up at the airport. My mom had called me a week or 2 before and LIED to me, saying she had won a couple of free meals for lunch at some fancy restaurant in Tampa- my dad couldn't go and so she wanted me to drive over (from Lakeland, 25 minutes) after work to go with her. She did convince me and I agreed. I actually got off work early and told my mom I would be there a little earlier if she wanted to go over some wedding plans (we were getting married in Tampa) with me. Well, she thought that was a marvelous idea! I walked in looking for mom in her office, when my fiance', Lupe, popped out of the closet carrying flowers, balloons, and a basket full of my favorite goodies! I was surprised, sort of....I guess I should add a little side note here!

A couple of weeks prior to this wonderful surprise, I had called Lupe on the phone while he was driving on the camp grounds. While talking with him, he tells me to hold on a minute because Kim (a close friend also on staff at the camp) had pulled up next to him and needed to talk to him. All of a sudden here a very excited Kim ask in her very excited voice, "SO, are you going to see Jenn- did it work out to go? Are you going?". Right after I hear that, the phone gets very muffled (as if a hand may be covering the speaker, lol) before Lupe gets back to the phone. Now, my mind was wandering- could she really be talking about him coming to Florida? I found the idea impossible until Lupe came back to the phone- when I asked him if everything was okay, he lies saying, "oh, Kim was just asking about an upcoming retreat"- THAT is when I knew something was up! I still wasn't totally convinced, because Lupe said nothing even remotely leading me to believe that he would be coming!

But, regardless of me getting a bit of a hint- it was one of the sweetest things he has done. Especially when I remember how he was stranded at the Atlanta Airport overnight because of weather. Lupe's cell phone died, because of course he didn't bring his charger because he would only be gone for the day. So, it was a bit of a mess- but so worth every minute! I didn't have a gift to give him, because it was all waiting for him at home in Columbus, Texas.

Such an incredible memory, such an incredible wonderful man that God has given me! A man, who brings me coffee in bed every morning, gets the girls up, fed, lunches packed, goes to work to take care of his family, cooks, does laundry, makes the bed, empties the dishwasher, cleans the kitchen, reads and lives God's Word, takes his family to church, loves, cares, and disciplines his children, and he does what's right- not to be right, but because it's right...the list could go on forever. Lupe loves me and all of my faults, and he their may be things he wishes I'd change- but he never tries to change me.

I am blessed beyond measure and so in love with my husband!

!!!!!Celebrate!!!!!!

I could not let today go by without blogging, because tomorrow is a big day in the Garcia family! Gianna Avie Garcia is turning 4 years old!

I blogged several months ago about The Best "OOPS" That Ever Happened To Me (follow the link to read)- and that is exactly what Gianna is!
This is the first year we will be having "family parties" for our girls Birthdays- just the 4 of us and any other family who is able to come. We're allowing the Gianna to plan her favorite meals for the day, and she will wake up to balloons and streamers and decorations. Of course, we will end the day with a Barbie Cake and gifts. It will be a day to celebrate her and the gift she is to all of us!

It's so easy to go through the motions of planning a party and a day, and forget to reflect on what the celebration is. I decided this morning that I wanted to write a little something about my baby girl, so it caused me to really start thinking and remembering. I went back and read the blog above that I wrote about her- I grinned ear to ear as it brought back memories.

I also remembered when she was 3 weeks old, a very scary day. Everything was fine as I nursed her and read a book. When it was time to burp her, I sat her up- and something didn't seem so okay anymore. She was kind of limp- well, more limp than what a 3 week old typically is, and it seemed her color was not right. I started to "burp" her a little more aggressively to get her to respond to me. Gianna's eyes began to roll back in her head and her color was getting worse- I knew something was wrong when her lips began turning blue and white. Talk about multi-tasking- while trying to revive my child, I called Lupe hysterical, ran up the stairs to check on a sleeping Tenly, and prayed like I had never prayed before. Of course, by the time Lupe arrived home (he was there in probably 3 minutes with a baby sitter in tow- thank you Jessica) Gianna's eyes were opened, she had a very tired cry and her color was still way off.

We headed to the ER, considering you can never be to cautious with a new born baby. We lived in Columbus, which is a VERY small town- needless to say they were not equipped to deal with infants. They insisted because of her age and the circumstances, we needed to be transported to Texas Children's Hospital, they wanted to be sure everything was ruled out before they issued a clean bill of health.

We spent 3 days there, Lupe and I taking shifts between sleep (they gave us a room in Ronald McDonald House in the hospital) and being with Gia. We held her almost nonstop the whole 3 days, and no one could of convinced me to anything other than that. They ruled it acid reflux, and considering she was 4 weeks premature it sometimes has severe side effects.

A situation like that makes you value your children in a different way......I am so Thankful.

Gianna is one of the sweetest little girls you'll ever know. She is on the quiet side a bit, until she jumps into Tenly's comfortableness, but once she opens up and connects to you- she'll steal your heart. Tenly is her best friend, and she can't wait to have her home all to herself every day. Gianna is a giver, and loves to see others happy. She's a very compassionate little girl, taking every opportunity to tell you how much she loves you. Our little Gia looks like her Mommy, but she has more of her Daddy's personality. She loves to cuddle and sit close- which I take full advantage of. She looks forward to being my little assistant, as she tags along on my errand running and meetings without complaining and ever giving a problem.

Gianna is still known by the little pink stringy blanket and by her wild uncontrollable hair (another thing I gave her). She's a genius with puzzles and anything resembling a computer. But, I believe this little girl- who God told me was called to the world when she was still in my belly (You can read about that one here:Starting Young: Gianna Called To The World) will be know by the love that radiates out of her. She is so special- the best "OOPS!" that ever happened to me!

Packing Memories

Not much joy comes out of packing up all of your belongings to move down the road. It's just a pain! Through the headache of it all, I have found some "smiles" along the way.

First, it gives me the opportunity to sort, purge, and organize...strangely enough, this is something I truly enjoy doing! As I was going through closets and pulling down boxes and bins to be moved into our new home, I found myself with a huge smile as I looked up and read the label on the side of a box, "Tenly & Gianna Baby Memories".
Of course, I should never have opened it up- but I just couldn't help myself. Then, to my dismay, I realized that when this box had last been packed, I had packed it very well and efficiently as to preserve "the memories". Every item had been wrapped in white tissue paper and labeled specifically. I kind of let out a big sigh, I really wanted to look at the stuff....yet again, I couldn't help myself and began to unwrap each item one at a time. So glad I did, every one I unwrapped brought back a memory, a tear, and a smile....and I couldn't help but share my "T & G Memories"......

Tenly's Home From The Hospital Outfit

Gianna's Home From The Hospital Outfit

The Girls Hospital Shirts and Blankets and Tenly's Baby Brush From Dana

Tenly's Dedication Outfit at BWOC

Dedication Bibles Given To The Girls From Pastors Tommy and Rachel

Gianna's Dedication Outfit- BWOC

Tenly's First Birthday Dress From Aunt Chris

Gianna's First Birthday Outfit

Daddy Brought Back Mexican Dresses from His Missions Trip To Mexico

Tenly's First School Backpack

Zakia Had This Hung Over Tenly's Crib When We Arrived Home, Signed By All Of The BMI Staff. Very Special

The Girls Each Have A Box Stuffed Full of Sonogram Pics, Birthday Invites, Finger Paintings, Little Projects, and All of The "Firsts" I Am  Able to Keep a Small Something From.

Each one of these hold a reminder of God's goodness and  faithfulness in our lives.
There's another box I haven't gotten to yet, it is packed full of all of Lupe and my memories....I will spare you all of the pictures and memories of all that....
Little bits of smiles and happiness in packing............................ 

My Love for My Dining Room Table...

Our "Yard Sale Table & Chairs"

My Dining Room Table, that is what I am Thankful for today. Of course, I must tell the story.......
When we moved to Florida last year, we left our things in Texas until we found where we would be living. Once we found our apartment, it became quite clear that our large 10 seat dining room table was not going to fit our much smaller home. Besides the fact, it took us 2 weeks to get our furniture- another long story told in a previous post. So, when we moved in, the only furniture we had was our girls beds, and a couple of air mattresses- and at that point we did not know how long it would take to get the rest of our stuff.

Memories, Fruit Pizza at our Table

My wonderful husband got up early on that Saturday and decided he was going to a couple of yard sales to see what he could find. By the way, this is another little thing I love about Lupe- he knows it would just make it better. Well, he was successful- he first found a Yard Sale with one of those white plastic outdoor tables and 7 outdoor plastic chairs to match for $20. A couple of Yard Sales later, he found the table in my picture- an older, slightly warped marked up, wooden table for $10 (no chairs), and he knew that it would suit us better. (He also found a cushioned outdoor metal chair that we used in our living room until our furniture arrived)

Made Smoothies at Our Table

Once our furniture did arrive, we gave our huge table away and gratefully continued using our "bargain table" with the plastic yard chairs. Here we are 9 months later, and we still sit to our comfy "bargain table" for every meal. Sometimes, I look at it and wish for a prettier "matching" table- but most of the time I don't even notice the mismatched plastic chairs and all the scrapes and bubbles. I guess, I just appreciate a place for my family to sit together and have a meal. We could of used money to have bought a new one already, but I love the fact that we have used the little extra we've had a few times to create other memories and moments as a family.

Our "Former" Table Memories

I started "loving" my little table this past week when we've taking time to say and talk about what we are Thankful for- something my girls and us look forward to nowadays. I am SO thankful, my family has a little yard sale table to sit around in plastic chairs in our small cozy apartment eating a hot good meal TOGETHER! Looking back, there are many miracles that have brought us to today- I am beyond Thankful for the Grace of God that has sustained us.

Daddy's Birthday at Our Old Table

An update on Lupe's job: They have been having some "opportunities" getting some of the paperwork through, so it has pushed Lupe's start date to Nov. 12- which means no paycheck for 2 weeks when we are not at a place to go without one. On a positive note, Lupe has had a 2 week FULL vacation- that hasn't happened in a LONG time! I love that we have not panicked- but have more easily trusted God, believing He will make a way. Just today, at work we had to let someone go because of an unfortunate situation. As badly as that was for that person, my hours at work more than doubled. I am still learning Trust and Faith, but I am more convinced of it every day! God is SO good and so faithful!

Teaching Thankfulness


It's November, and I've noticed on Facebook and Blogs, many expressing Thankfulness and Gratitude in posts and status updates. So, I started to think about the things I'm Thankful for, and also how to teach my girls that same thing. I decided, that as a family we could use our dinner time as an opportunity to learn about and express what we are thankful for and I would write it down in the journal that I keep and put it in a "Thankful Jar".

I also decided, I would use my Blog as an opportunity to share what I am Thankful for- and in doing so, I hope to change my heart and my mindset.

There are the obvious things- but also the most important things- that I am Thankful for. My family, my Parents, my Sister and Brothers and their Husband/Wives, my nieces and nephew, Aunts, Uncles, and Cousins.

Then of course, I am Thankful for my incredible Husband, Lupe, and my beautiful Daughters, Tenly and Gianna.

It is so easy to take family for granted sometimes. We often take our frustrations, bad moods, inadequacies, failures, tiredness, moodiness out on our families....the very people who love us most. It seems as if that is why we take our "stuff" out on them for that very reason- because we love them and they love us so much. I mean, they have to love us regardless of what we do/say/act, because they are family. But, that doesn't mean that we still have scard them with our words/actions/emotions.

I was watching Oprah's new show on the OWN Network last night (that's right, I watched Oprah- and learned something- don't judge me!!), and she was reflecting back on a show that she did with Toni Morrison. Toni Morrison was explaining about a life changing moment she had with her children. She was speaking of how she reacted when her children entered the room- she explained how often she was telling them to do something, change something, clean something, complete something. Then, one day she had the realization that she was lacking to celebrate them and was beginning to see a look of sadness/frustration on their faces because they were not being celebrated/validated.

It seems like such a simple thing- and really, it is! So, I know I'm not the only one who finds myself doing the very thing that Toni Morrison found herself doing. Not that our kids do not need to be reminded to do/clean/change/complete things- but can we at least celebrate them before we give them a list of instructions.

So, in being Thankful for my family, I find myself challenged to celebrate not only my children- but all of them! I'm doing this for myself- but also for my girls- I want to teach them how to appreciate their family and to celebrate them- the ones we see frequently and the ones we seldom see.

Family

WOW- I'm feeling getting to blog after way to long! Between the business of life and getting sick and losing every bit of energy I had for over a week, I'm finally getting back to normal (whatever that is).

About a week and a half ago, my Aunt Net put together a Family Reunion for the Denson Family....it has been a long time.I don't remember at what age I began to understand the "family breakdown"- you know- who are in the family by blood vs. who is in the family by marriage. In my Dad's family especially, they were always so close. Majority of my Aunts and Uncles who married into the family called my Granny and PawPaw "Mom and Dad" and treated each other as a true part. So, it was difficult for me to understand who my dad's sisters (6) and brothers (1) were and which were the spouses. They were just family- no separation. Part of the reunion we had, was celebrating my Uncle Norris, who was my Dad's sister, Frankie's (she passed away in 2005) husband. We were celebrating him and the incredible legacy as a man of God and a pillar in our family- although he did marry into the family- you would never know. I love that. I love that we are just family- a great family.

See, growing up we used to have these HUGE family reunions with a few hundred people (and yes, I was related somehow to most of them) almost every year. It was a day full of food. fun, and being oohed and awed over by people who knew me and I didn't have a clue who they were. But, I have many memories from those reunions of playing all day with my many many cousins and leaving exhausted!
It's been many years since we've had a HUGE reunion. My Grandparents passed away many years ago, but my Dad's family has remained close although struggling to stay connected while living all over the place and taking care of their individual families. After my Aunt Frankie passed away and a few years later my cousin Mal also did- my Aunt Net took it upon herself to get us all back together for a weekend. This is no easy task with 8 brothers and sisters, and countless children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, and even great-great grandchildren.
Not all of the family were able to make it, but a good number of us were- and it was a much needed time. It was especially wonderful to get to see and talk to my Aunt Net and Uncle Bull. Since they had 2 boys, somehow there was always a connection between us and I kind of became their baby girl. Spent many weekends being spoiled rotten by them at their house. They've always had a special place in my heart and I in theirs. It had been way to long since I had seen or talked with them, and my Uncle Bull hadn't been in the best of health as of late. I loved that I was able to look in his eyes and tell him I loved him and see that he was okay, while my Aunt Net ran around coordinating everyone and everything.
I loved introducing my girls to all of their MANY family members! Tenly, especially, was amazed at how big our family was. Lupe met many that he had never met, and it was special to reconnect relationships that had been unintentionally neglected. The Denson Family are almost all incredible singers and musicians. Growing up they even had a Singing Group called "The Happy Christians"- it's okay- I know you are laughing at that name. We would travel around to churches and functions with them and they would call all of my cousins and I "The Baby Christan's" and make us come up and sing to- UGH! Anyway, during the reunion, so many of the family went up and sang and had all the instruments pulled out. Although, I've always been aware of how incredibly talented my family is- I still sat there listening in amazement at the talent within the Denson Family. Not only my blood relations, but also so many of the people who have married into our family are unbelievably talented musicians and singers. It was great to see everyone marvel at the talent that so many of us hadn't seen in years and some talent that's never been witnessed by others in that room- we watched   and marveled at the talent God has blessed us with.
I took away from that weekend an urgency to never let this many years to go by without at least being in contact with my many Aunts, Uncles, and Cousins. I want my girls to experience family- and even all of that effort falls on my shoulders- I'll carry it and at least try. It's to important not to have.