Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Day 2: Stressing My Kids?

Before reading this post, you may want to first read: "What Do You Expect?" and then read: "Giving Up Control, A Little Bit". It will just all make a little more sense.

Here I am! That's right, as of this morning, I have survived this mess of a house thus far!

Yesterday, I had to stop and laugh at myself MANY times. I cannot even count how much I caught myself about to say, "Girls, you need to pick this up.." or "You need to put this away.." But I did catch myself each time and never said a word. 

Girls bedroom towards end of day 1
I really don't think they noticed much until they went to bed last night. I did notice while they were taking their bath that there were toys on both of their unmade beds, it made me curious to see what would happen when they went to climb in to go "mimi's" (what we call bed time). I was actually on the phone with a friend while my husband was getting them ready to tuck them in. By the time my phone call ended, they were in their beds already. I asked Lupe if he had them clean up, and he didn't. I was very excited about this next part that he told me. He said they went to get in their beds and they said, "Daddy, we can't go to sleep- this is a mess and we haven't cleaned up yet!" WOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!! But before I was carried away with excitement, he told me that it was probably more about staying up awhile longer than about cleaning up. Okay, that did take me excitement down a notch, BUT they DID realize "the mess"!!!!

Girls bedroom towards end of day 1
When I went in to give them a kiss, Tenly told me they only cleaned up a little bit. I explained again, that over the next couple of days it was she and Gianna's decision of what did and did not need to be cleaned up- and whatever they decided would be fine with me. Then she said, "Mommy, I think I like my room clean instead of dirty.." WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO!!!!! 
If you heard screaming and yelling anywhere in the USA last night, it was just me having a party over that last statement my 6 year old said. Now, she hasn't really done much of anything to back that statement up, but she still said it. So, I am left to wonder if she only said it because that is what she thought I wanted to hear- and that is possible (aw, MAN!). I guess am just excited that their is an awareness of the difference in our home without the messes being managed.

Living room day 1. Ironing in background.
I have been pleasantly surprised by my ability to function within this mess (of course it helped that my husband brought me home an Italian Creme Cake last night. Maybe it is because I know I am taking back over being sure everything is put in it's place on Thursday. Or, it could be thanks to my friend Martha instructing me to keep myself distracted. I have been doing that by catching up all of my ironing, working on my other blog ("Hot Momma's of Broward County" for anyone who didn't know) along with this one, and scrubbing my kitchen (I think I will scrub bathrooms today). 

What have I learned so far? Not really sure yet to be honest. I can tell you something I noticed last night. When I went in to kiss the girls good night, I noticed Tenly had made a little "tent" off of her bed for her babies. I feel vulnerable admitting this, but typically I would of insisted that it be taken down and folded at the end of her bed and all of her "babies" be put back in the respectable places. When I saw it last night and again this morning I realized how much joy it brought her to create it and have it be loved and accepted by myself- so is it really that important to remove that joy just so that everything looks "nice neat and pretty"- and no it's not. As much as my kids stress me out with me having to remind them 7+ times to stay on task- am I stressing my kids out by forcing them inside my dysfunctional "bubble".
Tenly's 'tent' morning of day 2.

I am documenting our "messy journey" with a few pictures and may even try to get a little video of my girls on the last day before I implement the cleaning of everything in celebration of my taking back control! So the pictures hear are of last night and this morning. Give me your opinion- how bad is it????

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