Thursday, August 18, 2011

Must Be A Part Of The Bigger Picture......

This past week has been pretty good, just extremely CRAZY!
Began with just Lupe and I, our girls were in Clearwater with my parents. It was nice, quiet (too quiet), clean (too clean), had a lot of time on our hands (too much time). But, we did enjoy some of that time to reconnect, just the 2 of us- of course we did that the few times we weren't working.
Then, it really was an insane week at work- for Lupe and I. People not showing up, working very long- unscheduled hours, attitudes, get the picture. We were both to tired to even encourage each other with more than a sweet, "I love you", before our eyes closed.
Weight of The World
Wednesday came both to quickly and to slowly, because this was the day we were meeting my parents in Ft. Myers to pick up Tenly and Gianna. It was exciting and slow coming to pick up our girls- and came to quickly because we were both going to spend 4+ hours on the road after a long day of work and an early morning the next day.
That leads me to today, Thursday. Seems like the end of a beginning in some ways. I'm typing all of this before we've even talked to anyone in our family. Feel like it's helping me sort out my thoughts a bit:
I'd be lying if I said I didn't notice how rough/exhausted/drawn/worn out/stressed Lupe looked this morning. I've said it many times, but this is not my husband. It takes A LOT to get him to this point- and I hate seeing him this way. This morning, he just looked like a man carrying the World. So, in many ways I was terribly shocked when my boss called me out of the gym to tell me he was on the phone (he has never called me on my work #). When I put my mouth to the phone, I could tell by his tone more than his words of, "I'm done, I can't do this anymore- I just can't!". I'll never be able to describe how badly my heart hurt to hear him- I've never heard Lupe sound defeated. I was (and am) so angry, that those people beat my husband down to the point of hurting his heart and his spirit. I held back tears as I told him I supported any decision he needed to make, and if he needed me to pick him up then.
Lupe is a man of integrity, such an admirable trait. After talking a few minutes, he chose to pray- called and asked for counsel from a few of his mentors and close friends before he went into a meeting with his GM. We were praying for wisdom, understanding, and favor. Considering Lupe has a mutual respect for his GM- he walked in and out of that meeting with everything we were praying for. Lupe gave his notice, agreeing to stay until someone else is hired- unless he receives a job before that.
Lupe is questioning his decision to take this job back in December- if he should of waited- if he, no we- jumped out of desperation and fear. I guess we'll never really know that answer, although I really believe that all of this is and must be part of a bigger picture. God has a plan, and yet again- I am choosing (because my head says to freak out) to trust, because I truly do not and cannot understand.
Once again, here we are trusting and I'm desperately trying not to walk in fear. Lupe came in tonight, walking straighter and smiling brighter- he really was. When I asked him how he was, he said he's relieved and at peace. I love that he didn't say how stressed or worried he was. I would rather he work more hours at WalMart or anywhere but come home happy without the stress.
One more thing...Prayers....we could really use a lot of prayers.......................

1 comment:

  1. Of course you all are in our prayers. We to went through a similar situation. When our company got bought out, I love my profession, but hated my job. I was ready for the Wal Mart job, I couldn't take it anymore, so I feel I know what Lupe was going through,. But then God opened this door, and like you we moved across the country, but not to family, we moved away from all our family, which I feel was a real test. But so far so good. I feel good about what I do, and Cat and I have never been closer to each other. I admire Lupe, he is a big man in Christ with a big heart. That is what I admire the most of him, and am proud to call him friend. I believe God will bring the right job. So yes, keep your head up, trust in the Father, follow your husband and all will work itself out.
    We miss you all.